Ancient Oscars?!?

I just found out through the mighty power of the Internet that the Oscars, or something remarkably similar, go way back into antiquity. Ancient, primitive peoples in the Andes region in South America (later populated by the better known Inca) would have a form of a yearly celebration that included passing out golden statues out to their most talented members. These statues, speculatively called an "Intiwarmi", were unfortunately given misguidedly. Often the presenters of the Intiwarmi would not know the difference between familiarity and quality. Therefore their incredibly advanced society decayed into petty popularity struggles, and eventually ruin. It has been shown that the early Inca based most of their religion and indeed, culture on the practices of these forever-mysterious people. And as we all know, they too eventually fell into ruin.

The above example of recently discovered artwork shows a significant resemblance the Inca Tumi knife (pictured below), which is now used as symbol of good luck by Peruvians. However, even more momentous is the almost prophetic qualities of detail pertaining to the modern day Oscars. It is subtle, but if one were to look close one could almost make out vague similarities between several key elements and current film technology. Could these ancient people have possessed the sacred knowledge of Oscar Hype, Paparazzi, and Dirty Money? Could they have been so advanced as to master the fine art of manipulating the very essence of their own society through media saturation? Could they have produced artwork of such a supreme level as the Romantic-Comedy, or WWII Drama – what had been lost to humanity until only very recently? It is astonishing, but one need only look at the facts to see truth clearly shining through – Clint Eastwood could beat up Leonardo DiCaprio in a fist fight any day of the week.